The Best Advice of the Season

'Tis the season of friendly advice. Have you noticed how many lifestyle experts are suddenly employed by major networks, magazine publishers, and online new sources? Seems each has his or her own list of suggestions to make our holiday season the most festive, organized, stress-free, happy, simple, inexpensive (the list goes on and on) of our lifetime. When I'm not stressed over making sure I have accessorized my day-to-evening look properly, I'm busily gathering toilet paper tubes, flameless candles, Christmas tree cuttings and assorted nuts and berries to give my home that "not-overdone" seasonal glow.

It's the second day of December and the endless wisdom of those in the know has already simultaneously made me feel exhausted and lazy.

Truth is, I've tried many of these innovative plans in Christmases past. I've attempted the handmade holiday, the "Let's just stay home in our pajamas and be cozy" holiday, the "Make sure everyone has everything on their list" holiday, and the traditional "Griswald Family Christmas" holiday. Through it all, I've become grayer, wiser, and much more skeptical of the musings of what we now call "lifestyle experts." Most importantly, all my experience has given me insight. I believe I hold the ONE piece of advice everyone really needs to hear about how to plan and execute the perfect Christmas.

Drumroll.

Seriously, drumroll . . . . . . .

You can't plan joy.

That's it.

Seems anticlimactic, but trust me, it's the truest statement you will hear this season. For all the time and effort and sweat and, yes, sometimes even blood, that you put into making this the best holiday for you and your family, you can't plan joy. The most meaningful and loving moments you experience will come in the midst of chaos, or quiet, or the aftermath of everything you thought was important.

So before you make another list, or beat yourself up for one more thing you haven't or can't achieve, chin up! Joy will come when you least expect it, and most certainly when you don't plan it.

Be sure you're still awake and present enough
to catch hold and savor it!

December, A Time for Letting Go

December has arrived. As I set about decorating for the season, I can't help but notice how many boxes have accumulated in my basement over the years. Some hold tried and true ornaments, some are filled with lights for inside and out, some hold treasures made long ago by little hands, which have now grown to teenaged hands.

But what baffles me each year are the many boxes packed with things that never get dusted off and displayed. I have found myself (for several years in a row) opening these boxes, mentally determining their contents unfit or no longer desired, and placing them back on the shelf. What keeps me from donating or dumping what's inside? What attachment do I have for objects that can't hold my interest long enough to unwrap them from years' old newsprint?

Seems these things I hold so tightly carry with them a burden. I dread opening them each year. I feel guilt for collecting so much stuff and more guilt for being unable or unwilling to get rid of it. The stuff takes up space, too. Its mass is cluttering and closes in on my ability to breathe easily. It steals a place I could fill with something I would really love, something I would look forward to opening each year.

If a few unwanted boxes of Christmas decorations carry such a chain reaction of emotion and obligation, what about the other baggage I carry around everyday? How many boxes are hidden in my life filled with habits, memories, grudges, hurts, dreams, goals, etc.? What do I dread opening for fear it will remind me of what I am afraid to confront, unwilling to unpack, too stubborn to face, or too cautious to try? 

If I clear out those cluttered spaces, what blessings, joys, hopes, and love might fill the newly empty spaces?

Not a bad thought to ponder this Advent season. What fills the spaces of your life, your heart, and your home? Which of those are you ready to face and let go? 

For me today, it starts with a trip to Goodwill!